“Love’s last gift…remembrance”
It’s 10.06am and I’m sitting up in bed, laptop on my knee.
For the first time this morning, the silence is deafening; the two eldest boys have gone to tennis, the baby is sleeping and my daughter is occupied in the toy room downstairs.
So for the first time since we heard the news last night, I am able to fully process the devastating news that a bright young rugby star, who was a family friend, and one of my husband’s “boys”, died alongside his father and brother in a tragic farming accident at their home.
Nevin Spence was an incredible young man: bright, enthusiastic and with an insatiable love of life. I can’t confess to knowing him very well, as it is Ryan who represented him, but I am experiencing first hand the raw emotions that are part and parcel of losing someone very dear.
I cannot even begin to imagine what his mother must be going through with three family members lost, and a daughter seriously ill in hospital. It’s more than any human being should have to endure.
At times like this I struggle with my own feelings of helplessness. I want to reach out to those who knew Nevin, to try to take their pain away. I watch my beloved husband struggle with his feelings of loss and sadness, and I want to do something to make it better. I feel futile.
So I write. I write these words in the hope that they will help me to make sense of what happened. I write simply because it is a release; something I can do amidst the chaos of futility.
Hold your loved ones tight today. Tell them you love them and never let go. For you never know… you just never know.