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Category Archives: Life’s lessons

The Plan

“I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time.  Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.”  E.B. White (author of Charlotte’s Web)

It is increasingly apparent to me that most of us are not programmed to proactively plan our lives.  And why would we be?

When we are children, our parents and then school, tell us what to do: when to eat, when to sleep, when to get up and where we can and can’t go.

We are not taught to choose the things that are important to us and follow them passionately.

Imagine the difference in the mindset of the next generation, if we set about learning this as adults, and then passing the message on.

Before I Die

Imagine that you are at the end of your life, on your deathbed; barely able to talk or move, but able to clearly hear what those around you are saying.

As you lie there, people visit you to pay their last respects.  They do not know that you can hear them, and so talk freely to each other about you.

What do they say?

What would your children say?

What would your family and friends say?

What would they say your major achievements were in your life?

What would they say about your quality of life?

What would they say you had missed out on in life?

If the answers you are imagining are not what you would like to hear, then it’s your responsibility to change them.

Life is marching on you won’t get another chance at this one.

How are you choosing to spend it? 

 

Visualisation With Intent

The famous golfer Jack Nicklaus apparently never hit a shot without first clearly visualising where the ball would go, which was usually “sitting up there high and white and pretty on the green.”

He was famed for claiming that a successful shot was 50% visualisation, 40% setup and only 10% swing.

Arnold Swarzenneger was adamant that pumping a weight one time with full consciousness was worth ten without mental awareness.

So what is really real then?

Actually the answer to this question is unimportant.  What is important is that thought, images and feelings have a greater influence on the world than we would like to believe.

Your intention for something; your image in your mind of how it should be, will be the single most powerful tool in helping you create it.

What kind of parent do you want to be?  

What kind of life do you want to have?

What way would you treat your customers?

How would you handle product returns?

Couple powerful intent with persistent practice, and the world is your oyster.

What Will We Teach Today?

“An understanding heart is everything in a teacher, and cannot be esteemed highly enough. One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feeling. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.”   Carl Jung

My oldest niece has recently started high school and it has been a very traumatic time for her and for my sister.

She is nearly twelve years old, and just on the cusp of womanhood, but yet in every way is still so much a child.  She is innocent, pure and sweet, but also has a maturity beyond her years.  The is thoughtful, inquisitive and quietly observant.

It has disturbed me just how difficult the transition into high school has been.  She has moved from a reasonably small primary school, where the teachers were kind and thoughtful, into an academic institution where the main mode of motivation seems to be humiliation and shame.

It has deeply troubled me, thinking of her innocence being stripped away layer by layer, with every degrading comment and scathing look, the downtrodden teachers have bestowed on her, and the other innocent incomers.

It astounds me that these teachers don’t seem to comprehend that they are raising the next generation of society.  Every day I hear people complain about the state of the world, yet why do we not speak up and do something about it?

Our footballers are paid thousands if not millions of pounds every week, yet we pay our teachers a pittance.  Where is the logic in that?  Would the world be a better place if we had more sports stars, or a more deeply loved generation of society?

Einstein is quoted as saying that the world is not a bad place because of the people who to bad things, but because of the people who stand by and say nothing.

Please, don’t stand by.  Speak up when you see something not right.  Do not allow it to be acceptable.  If not for yourself, then for your children.

Let’s make this world a better place to live, so they may be treated with respect and kindness, and not live in fear or humiliation or shame.

Help and Serve

“Nothing liberates our greatness like the desire to help and the desire to serve.”  Marianne Williamson

How many of your customers/friends/colleagues have you mindfully helped or served today?

Pick up the phone, offer to help, do something nice or unexpectedly helpful.

Liberate your greatness.

Your Life: A Sparkly String Of Fairy Lights?

Have you ever noticed how as we get older, time seems to go faster?  

I was speaking to someone last night on the phone that I haven’t seen for almost a year.  When she asked me what I had been up to, I honestly couldn’t answer her.  Events have seemed to merge into each other.

The problem is that when we are kids, time seems to go pretty slowly.

So when something happens that is slightly out of routine, it seems exciting and memorable because most of what they do and experience is new to them.

As we grow up, time is punctuated by exciting adult events:  graduating high school, your first job, getting engaged, getting married, your first child…  But then we have kids, settle down and life becomes routine.  The special times do not occur as frequently.

A few years ago I made a commitment to myself that I would treat every occasion in my life, as a special one.

I would wear my best dress on an insignificant day or drink champagne with family because being with them was the occasion.  I thought about things I could do to create my own family memories.

I asked my kids what we could do as a family this year, to make the year stand out.  A beach holiday?  A outing to a funfair?  A big family barbecue with a bouncy castle?

Start spicing up your life with exciting events.  Involve your kids, and create lasting memories.

Make your life look like a sparkly string of fairy lights.

Changing The Status Quo

“We cannot change anything until we accept it.  Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.”  Carl Jung

But the problem is that many of us aren’t actually willing to stand up for change, we just want to complain about the way things are, as if complaining will make a difference:

Isn’t it just dreadful…

It makes me so mad…

If only things were different…

I wish…

It’s the government/school/company’s fault…

Starting our dialogue, whether internal or external, with any of these prefixes only reinforces our own feelings of futility and strengthens our belief in our inability to affect change.

Yet, if we spent as much time doing something about the situation as we do condemning it, the world might be a different place.

Fear usually makes a situation seem more complicated than it is.  We get so caught up in our own internal process, that we can’t assess a situation rationally.  Either that or we are unwilling to do what is necessary to change something we are unhappy about.

So we don’t.  We stay as we are, and continue to suffer over a situation we feel we can do nothing about.

And herein lies your choice:

Condemn the situation, suffer and complain

Accept the situation, let go of the drama

(Or the most effective of all strategies)

Accept the situation, let go of the drama, and take active steps to change it.

 

 

 

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